Monday, November 1, 2010

Potty Training Regression

The title of this post is my latest Google search.  UGH. 

Why is this process proving to be so difficult?  Here are my theories:
1- I have an extremely stubborn child.
2- My child has an extremely stubborn mother.
3- My child's goal in life is clearly NOT to "make me happy".

By my calculations, he was what I would call "potty trained" about 3 months ago.  However, for the past few weeks, he has decided to poops in his pants (the peeing is still in the toilet).  The last straw was this weekend when he pooped NEXT TO the toilet.  Really.  This kid gets it.  He is being willful and defiant.  Awesome.  Future leader, right?  ;)
Anyway, starting today, he's back in the diapers.  It was his choice.  I told him last night that if he continued to poop in his pants, he would have to wear diapers.  This morning when getting dressed, he requested a diaper, so that is what he is wearing today.  Not my favorite solution, but I'm out of ideas.

I don't really know the "rules" of this parenting thing, but this whole situation has gotten me very frustrated.  I know that I'm not supposed to show him that I'm frustrated, but that just seems silly.....because I AM.  I'm trying to be sensitive to his needs, while at the same time acting like cleaning up poop doesn't bother me....but it does.  It wouldn't bother me if I thought he was actually having accidents, but he's doing this on purpose.  My husband says he is probably just going through some developmental changes, and needs us to back off and give him some space on this. Why does he always seem so level headed about these things?

Then my mind wanders to bigger picture  If a 2 year old is able to frustrate me this much over pooping, what does my future as a mother of a teenager hold?   Can I do this?  Which battles do we really need to stick to our guns on?   Why do the "hard times" seem so easy in retrospect? 

Then my mind really sticks it to me, and points out crazy parenting makes me:  I spend half of the time holding on tight, hugging, kissing, and snuggling the time away.  Not wanting him to ever grow out of this stage.  Savoring every minute.  The other half of the time, I'm yearning for this phase to pass, and looking forward to an easier stretch of time.  A time where I can regain some independence from him and regain some of my "old" life. (Although, I'm pretty sure that (realistically speaking) that old life is gone...probably for good.)

I guess the point of all of this is that the problems (whatever they are....pooping, eating, sleeping, tantrums....) come and go in waves.  I have try to take these waves as they come and take them for what they are:  temporary deviations from the norm.  Then I have to realize that the norm is constantly re-adjusting.  I guess it is our job as parents to help our kids through these times, and it is our job as spouses to help one another along.  Easier said than done, but something to try to remember.


On an unrelated note:  I think I feel like a bit of a curmudgeon lately.  I was totally NOT into Halloween, and am (secretly) glad its over.  Maybe I just don't like that holiday.  It creeps me out, and I don't think its fun.  Cy didn't seem to notice that he only went to two houses for trick or treating.

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