Saturday, April 24, 2010

There have been better days

I can't seem to crawl out of this FUNK.  Somedays are better than others, and today is a rough one.  The best way to describe how I'm feeling is "Frazzled".  I wish I could just pull it together.  I have been up since 5:11am this morning, and that is not helping AT ALL. 

There is no one thing that is getting to me, it really is just a compilation of these:

1-  My son has been going through a rough stage of hitting and biting, and its really starting to get to me.  I feel like I should be able to control him, and I can't.  Punishment works sometimes, but not always.  There are times when he lashes out for seemingly no reason, no frustration, no anger.  I just don't get it.  I feel helpless with this sometimes.  Its embarrassing and annoying all at the same time. I had to skip out on playgroup this weekend cause I just couldn't deal with having to "deal" with him.  That makes me feel even more pathetic.

2-  I feel like this wrist situation is never going to have resolution.  One day I need surgery, the next day, I might not, who knows when this will be over.  I'm tired of being casted, I'm ready to move on from this, but I can't.  I wish there were an endpoint in sight, and at this time, there is not.

3- I'm starting to really feel the "having a second child" crunch.  Its becoming an issue because my husband is very interested (90% so, according to him), and I'm very UNinterested (95% so, using the same scale).  So, we have a lot of negotiations coming our way, and its messing with my head.  I don't know how to make the "right" decision for us when we are at polar ends.  We have never been on such opposites sides of a topic before, and it feels stressful.  I have no idea how to resolve this, and its on my mind.  Alot.

All of this stuff just goes around and around in my head, and I start to feel "frazzled".  I'm fine,though.  No worries here....I think its all just normal life stuff.  Can't be all roses, right?


1 comment:

  1. I feel your pain, remembering when times were tough for me as a new mom in Texas basically by myself and wondering if I had done the right thing in having a baby when I could barely take care of myself and a husband who ws very demanding and not very helpful or understanding. I was lonely and flustered and just wanted out. Some how I made it through and have two wonderful daughters and now two fantastic grandsons. I wish I could be closer (mile wise) to help you get through this, but at the same time I know that you will "make it" too! We are strong, intelligent and caring women. I love you, Mom