Being a wife and a parent has taught me that the family that I have brings me an immense amount of joy. That same joy can turn into the deepest sorrow I could ever know. This isn't something that I think about alot, but there have been a few examples of this lately, and they have literally brought me to tears. This whole parenthood thing is making me weepy.....with joy and sadness!
A few weeks ago, I watched the movie Seven Pounds, and it made me cry. I cried because it poignantly shows that everything you love in life can be taken away from you in a very quick moment. I wept myself to sleep that night after watching it thinking about what my llife would be like without my husband or son (or both!?!?!).
(This is by no means a plug for the movie. Overall, it was "okay", and I would have really liked it if they would have explained what the actual Seven Pounds were...but that's another blog) .
A few days later, I was driving in the car and heard a man talking about marriage and relationships. He explained that he and his wife were having a difficult time because they lost a son 9 years ago to a genetic disease and now their youngest son was now dying of that same disease. How does a parent continue to go on once they lose a child? I don't know that I could bear this kind of pain, but to lose two has got to be devastating. How do you maintain your relationship with your spouse, or even just decide to get up in the morning? The man was so sweet and continued to try to make his wife happy during this horrible time in their lives. He was so committed to their relationship that he wasn't going to let the tragedy tear them apart. It was so touching, and added another moment of tears for me.
Now, for the record, I'm not much of a crier. Hard to believe, right? Its true. I'm usually pretty good about dealing with emotions as they come along....but when thoughts of losing these two people who make up my whole life get into my head, its not hard to start crying. Yikes. The thing that scares me the most about having these feelings is that I don't want to live my life in fear. I have to be mindful to concentrate on the positive and to savor every moment in life and enjoy the experiences that come my way. Easier said than done...but this is what I'm trying to learn from these feelings.
Until next time....those are my Arinomics for the day.